Look, she’s skinnier than me. She looks so pretty.

Her dress is so much nicer than mine.

She’s nine and she already has a double axel?! That’s not fair…

If you want to be content with your own self or your skating, just stop comparing yourself to others. There will always be others who you perceive as better than you--prettier, more popular, has better jumps or spins… But that's the problem. What you perceive does not equal reality. Maybe that other person who you have been obsessing about is just as self-conscious as you are, but she might be darn good at faking it. None of that comparing and jealousy will do you any good. 

You have to learn to embrace your strengths and differences, and use them to your own advantage. Maybe she does have better jumps than you--they're bigger, higher and is always the topic of conversation--but maybe you thrive under pressure when others crumble. Don’t just fixate on your weaknesses. Acknowledge them, and work on improving them. But, more importantly, use your strengths to your advantage. Pick music that you like, refine your choreography to suit your style, and make sure you express your strengths in your programs.

If all you care about is how another competitor acts, looks or performs like, remind yourself and reevaluate why you are in this sport. Is it to beat another competitor, or are you skating just for the joy of it?

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